Happy Halloween

I will be doing my homework and handing out candy tonight. My hubby is gone and my teenager will be out with her friend. Had a fantastic weekend with my 3 georgous, beautiful daughters and my 2 adorable perfect grandbabies. We went shopping, decorated Halloween cookies and went to see "Thriller" at Tuacahn. Grandchildren are da bomb. They are the reward for putting up with your children all those years! Tomorrow my hubby goes for a job interview. He lost his job back in May and it has been a difficult last few months to say the least. I am praying and hoping it all works out somehow. We are trying to keep our house. There are so many people in the same boat as us, life is hard for alot of people right now. Sometimes I get overwhelmed by it all. Friday I went to lunch with a friend and was overcome with emotion as I vented to her about life. There are just SO. MANY. THINGS. to worry about right now. The economy, my kids' future, my husband's job prospects, the moral decay of this world, trying to stay strong in my faith, I could go on and on! I am the type of person that worries and ruminates about everything in life. I know I have anxiety on a continual basis. The hardest thing is to put it all in God's hands. That is easier said than done. But I'm really trying.

brrrrr

Today is the real first cold day of this season. There is snow gently topping the mountains around me. I remember almost 18 1/2 years ago when we moved here from California. We looked around at the beauty that is this little valley and told ourselves we hope we never take it for granted. I think it's easy to do that. You live a place and life gets so busy you never stop to look around. The mountains of Utah really are beautiful. However, I will say that my first and true love is the sea. I don't know if it's cause I'm Cuban or because I grew up going to the beach every summer or the fact that it is just AWESOME, but the beach does it for me. Yes, I will appreciate the mountains I live in but I gotta have my beach fix every year or I simply can't survive. Now I'm off to boot camp to work my A** off!!!

Toilets

There are things in my life that I take for granted. Toilets are one of them. I watched a show last night about how billions of people in the world don't have toilets. They go on the side of the road, in a field, on the edge of the river. It's a huge problem because it gets in the water, the same water that they drink and bath in and eat the fish from. YUK, YUK, YUK is all I can say about that. How very blessed I am to have a clean toilet to do my business in. I went to Peru in 2008 with my son and there were some people we visited that didn't have a toilet either. They pretty much had a hole in the ground that you went in, then you swished down some water that was in a bucket next to the hole. I had to use that hole several times while we were visiting them. I remember thinking I would never complain again. Shame on all of us for complaining. Despite all the problems we find ourselves in in The United States of America, we still live in the most prosperous, privileged country in the world. So next time you sit down on that porcelain throne, you give thanks!
It's Monday and time for new beginnings and some motivation for the week! I ate way too much this weekend, so it's renewal time! Worked out hard this morning (P90X and a short run), will go to gym and do 40 minutes on the elliptical after work, then spinning tomorrow morning. Maybe, just maybe, I will lose an ounce of this ever-loving flab!!!!! It is such a constant battle for me.

Poor Bambi

The Annual Deer Hunt opened today. I live in a state where this is the most important and celebrated day of the year. Our local newspaper has almost weekly pictures of people posing with their dead animals. WTH??? I really and truly do not get it. My hubby woke up at the ungodly hour of 5 am this morning to go stalk Bambi's daddy. While I was on my run this morning I saw all kinds of men in their trucks with their orange/camoflouge on. My husband will watch "The Hunting Channel" for hours on end. That channel is sooo annoying, you have these guys that stalk an animal, then shoot it, then pat each other on the back and pose with the poor dead animal. But that's not even the worst part, the worst part is that the ENTIRE time they are doing this, they are whispering to each other, like "oh, k, he's over there, yeah, oh, good shot, wait, keep him in your sights", ad naseum.... all in a whisper voice.UGHHH.
 I went on my run this morning and doing some homework right now, then going to a movie later with my daughter. (my awesome wonderful teenage daughter that cleaned the house for me yesterday and went grocery shopping while I was at work - LOVE YOU CAMS!!) We are going to see Footloose! Yeah, we love dancing things. Oh, and next weekend we are going to see Thriller by Odyssey Dance. Well, I better get back to my homework, I'm such a procrastinator.

Spinning

Spin class at 5:45 am, then work till 5:30 pm = one tired mama! The thing is, I work out every single day of my life except Sundays. I have not lost one pound in years. NOT. ONE. POUND. I do P90X three times/week, spinning once or twice/week, running twice or three times/elliptical/ yoga, you name it, I do it!! Why on this good God's earth will the F'ing scale not move???? It's because I have to watch every single solitary morsel that goes into my pie hole. Food has been the enemy of mine for years and years. I have been working out for years, but have not been consistent (like super duper consistent like I need to be) with the food intake. I am finally turning a corner on it. I realize that food is fuel and if I'm going to work out so hard, I need to fuel my body correctly. So Eating Clean is the answer. I have changed my eating habits. I know it will be a slow process, but am taking it day by day. I try and eat about 5-6 small meals/day. I make sure I include a protein and a healthy carb in every one. For example, today I had a piece of toast (clean whole wheat bread) with clean peanut butter on it for breakfast, apple and string cheese for snack, leftover porkchop and sweet potatoe for lunch, and half a protein bar and cut up tomatoes and cucumbers for snack, then a healthy chicken chili for dinner. Whew! It sounds like a lot of food, but its all good food and I'm not hungry for the most part. I have learned alot about nutrition since I've been reading the clean eating blogs and books. It really is a daily struggle to find the balance between everything I need to do and working out and watching my diet. I am a little obsessed with it. There are some things that have happened in our life in the last few months that have been devastating and I feel like it has fueled my determination even more. There are certain things that are out of my control, but I feel like the food and exercise and working to change my body is something that is in my control. So I am very fierce about it right now. I know it will pay off. I want my heart to be healthy for many years to come. K, gotta get back to Biggest Loser now....

Sabbath Day

I don't know what it is about Sundays, but they have always been difficult for me. I wake up and it takes all I've got to get ready for church. I don't know why. The interesting thing is once I get to church, I'm so glad I went. A guy told a story today about how he almost drowned at a beach and a lifeguard had to save him. He said life is like that - you can't go out past the boundaries or you will get into trouble. There are lots of things we can drown from, drugs and alcohol, anger, passiveness. It was a great lesson. And of course my beautiful, wonderful children in Primary that I teach singing to made me feel God's presence. I'm facing a dilemma. I have been the primary chorister for almost 3 years and have asked to be released by the end of the year. It is the hardest calling I have ever had, but also the most rewarding. It is alot of work getting something ready each week and teaching the kids songs. Um, I don't read music, I don't play an instrument and I don't sing very well. But I love those kids and I know how to teach them to sing somehow. It has made me a better person. So as I was doing the dishes and singing a primary song I started to cry when I thought about being released. I feel like it's not time yet. But man, it's so much work! But man, I LOVE IT!! What to do??? Those kids teach me so much more than I teach them.

AHHHH

Great day. I got a massage. I love me some massage. It's only been the last few years that I have been getting them on an almost monthly basis. It is so therapeutic and relieves the stress I have. I have to take my second test in my class this weekend and I'm sooo not looking forward to it. Gotta study tomorrow, workout, clean house, get primary singing time ready, etc. My mother-in-law always says to me to be grateful that I'm so busy cause when you are old like her, it isn't fun to not be busy. The weather has been absolutely georgous. It's the indian summer we all love here in Utah.

Homeless

We heard a speaker today who taught school at a homeless shelter for years. The school was in downtown Salt Lake City and it was called "The School With No Name". So many life lessons learned from these homeless children. My children have always had a roof over their heads and food on the table. I oftentimes think, what makes us so special? Why are my kids not hungry and others are? Are homeless people just lazy or are they all drug addicts? Have they all made their own circumstances? I have always felt this pull and this compassion for people. My grandfather was like this. He taught me that we are all human beings and worthwhile in God's eyes. I hope I can remember that every single day. It gets difficult to remember as we live in our very comfortable home and eat our food. But I am going to make a renewed committment to try and help someone every single day, even if it's just to smile and say hi.

Salt Lake City

I'm in Salt Lake City for a couple of days for work meetings. Just had dinner with my niece. We have a once-a-year date in October when I have my annual work meetings here. It was great to see her. Her and her hubby are thinking about having a baby. I told her that it will be the most exhausting, difficult, frustrating, heart-wrenching thing she will ever do. But at the same time it is the most rewarding and life changing thing she will ever do. I truly believe there are lessons that can't be learned in this life without children. And now that I am a grandmother, my children are learning them. BTW - being a grandmother is the ONLY reason to not kill your kids...... there were days when I really wanted to. Oh, come on, if you are a parent, don't pretend you haven't thought about it!
I love the city this time of year. The mountains are beautiful. What great blessings I have in my life. I can't deny them. K, now going to my room and having a nice Tylenol PM cocktail so I can sleep....zzzzzz

Sing it, Barry

"I Write the Songs" came on the radio on my way home from the gym this morning. It's from 1975. I was 13 years old. Really?? Thirteen? How could it be? You literally blink your eyes and you're 49. Life is much too precious and much too short. If I could say one thing, it would be to cherish every day and don't sweat the small stuff. Focus on what's really important. I've learned two things in my old age - life is not easy and life is not fair. But if you have some faith and push through the hard times, you will realize that there is a reason for all of it. If we didn't have the bad, we wouldn't appreciate the good. Wow, I'm full of feel-good fuzzies today. Maybe it's the spin class I did at 5:45 am this morning, maybe it's because I get to miss work for the next three days cause I have meetings in the big city, maybe it's cause I put lots of pumpkins on my front porch yesterday. Whatever it is, I am going to seize the day and make it a great one! I get to go to the big city. Yeah! Restuarants and shopping and movies (oh, yeah, a little work meeting thrown in there for good measure). Hope you all have a good one too.

Monday Monday, So Good to Me

Started my day with some P90x, oh yeah! Chest, triceps and shoulders, ouch! That was a hard workout. Then walked/ran about 2.5 miles. Then went to the dentist and got two cavities filled. I like that I can watch a movie while he is working on my teeth, but don't bring a funny one (Taladega Nights) cause it was hard to laugh with all that stuff in my mouth. Then it was homework, laundry, made lunch for my teenager and her friends, more homeowork, help my hubby with some stuff, dinner, made homemade bread, more laundry, whew!! I need to go back to work for a break. But I want to personally thank Christopher Columbus for my day off. It was very productive and a great way to start my week.

Rest Day

Sundays I take a long nap. We get home from church, eat, then it's nap time. It's an exhausting day for some reason. We went to my daughters house and got pumpkins for our front porch. Her husband's family owns a farm and we get the most wonderful pumpkins every year. All different shapes and sizes. Tomorrow is a holiday! Yeah! Thank you Mr. Christopher Columbus. But I get to go get a cavity filled first thing in the morning. That's the way to spend your day off. UGH. OK, I don't have much to say today. I'm really tired for some reason. It's going to be a busy week. I have meetings in Salt Lake for my work. I know, I have a boring life, not much to talk about.

Saturday

It seems like Saturdays are always catch up day. Catch up on the laundry, catch up on cleaning, catch up on my homework, etc. Although I will say that my homework has been lacking lately. I am taking one class per semester right now, working on my bachelor's in psychology. This class is called "Analysis of Behavior". It has been hard getting into it. It's all about why animals and people behave the way they do and changing behavior. Sorta boring, but I need to get my head in the game. I have Sniffy, the virtual rat, that I need to do experiments with and me and Sniffy haven't seen each other in a while.
My daughter and adorable grandson spent the night last night. He got his first haircut and can I just say that he is the cutest kid on the planet? I have grandma bragging rights so I can say that. My daughter and I worked out this morning thank goodness cause I ate too much birthday ice cream yesterday. We did Tae Bo and then power walked for almost 2 miles. Can I just say that I am obsessed with working out? I do a little of everything. I do P90X, spinning, running, elliptical, yoga, etc. The problem is is that I have a 49 year old body that is Cuban, meaning it wants to be chubby. Have you ever seen a thin cuban? (I mean besides Gloria Estefan!) My body hangs on to every single inch of blubber it has. Age and genetics play a huge factor in weight. I always tell my hubby, what I wouldn't give to get my 25 year old body back!! OMG - I could eat anything I wanted, I worked out HALF as much, and I weighed 25 pounds less. Now I work out like a freakin' dog, eat half as much and weigh 25 pounds more. HUH???? How does that happen? Well, Tosca says that it's 10% genetics, 10 % working out and 80 percent what you eat. I'm screwed!! I love food! Hey, I made a rhyme.

Emmie Award

On October 7, 1962, my mom gave birth to me in Riverside, California. It was a long road to get there. Let me explain. She was married in Cuba to Julio, my father. All her siblings and parents had escaped to America. My grandparents lost everything to Castro. My mom was very young and when she discovered she was expecting a baby, she knew she wanted that baby to be born in a place where there was freedom. She was finally able to leave (by herself) 9 months along and going to a brand new world. I was born the day after she arrived. The unusual circumstances of my birth is one that my mom tells often. She started having labor pains on the airplane, but didn't know a word of english. She was terrified and all alone. Coincidentally, in the same hospital I was born, my grandfather was there after suffering a heart attack. I was the first grandchild born to Josephine and Jose Carrio and my mom claims that after my grandfather got to see me, it saved him. I'm not sure that's true, but it's a good story.

Well, my sweet teenager - those two words usually don't go together, now do they? - she brought me breakfast in bed at 6 am. It was great cause I just leisurely stayed in bed and watched "A Baby Story". How appropriate! I really should have gotten up and worked out, but alas, it was my birthday! There's no working out on your birthday, it's against the law.

I have been trying really hard to eat clean most of the time, but today I'm going to treat myself. Just as there is no working out on your birthday, it's also against the law to be on a diet on your birthday. Although I want to emphasize I'm not on a "diet". I have been dieting for the last 20 years and it doesn't work. Believe me. I just try to eat "clean" most of the time. Eating clean means eating stuff that is not processed and hardly any sugar and whole grains. So I guess Frosted Flakes are off the menu.... dang.

Haunted House

I just set up this blog and picked "travel" as my background. It looks like a haunted house! So if anyone out there knows how to change the background, let me know. I can't seem to figure it out.

It's My Birthday!

Tomorrow I will be 49 years old (I mean young!) Ha! I'm still 29 in my head. I can't believe how old I am. One day you look in the mirror and you have chin hairs! That's why I named this blog chin hairs. No one ever talks about those hideous things sticking out of old lady's chins! WTH is up with that? Where did they come from? Sure, I expected hot flashes, insomnia, lack of desire (yowza), and moodiness, but chin hairs?
I've never ever heard anyone talk about the face hair growing season. In spite of all that, I am feeling a surge of strength and confidence for some reason. I want 49 to be my best year yet. My goal is to blog on here every single day for the next year. I want to talk about stuff that pertains to women my age. So many blogs I read are about babies and raising your children, etc. I have a 17 1/2 year old at home who I never see. So I'm pretty much done with that stage of my life. Been there, done that, got the t-shirt!! Now I can sit back and enjoy my grandchildren. I have 4 fantastic, awesome kids that range in ages from 17-28. Now don't get me wrong, I wasn't a perfect mom by any means, but somehow my kids managed to come out being upright citizens and none of them are serial killers or drug addicts yet! (there's still time) My goal is to look like Tosca Reno by my 50th birthday. Don't know who she is, look her up! She is such a stud. She can do one handed push ups and she's like 52!!! HOLY CRAPOLA. So I'm going to make this a sort of fitness/life journal for the next year. I am determined to make some changes. I hope I can inspire some people along the way, including myself.